Podcast Show Notes
Podcast 04: Though we get frustrated with our kids asking ‘why’ questions it is an important aspect of knowing your world, We too, must know our world – why do we do the things that we do?
Listen to the Podcast – or keep on reading the blog.
- Do you Know Why? – When we know why we do things we find the motivation to carry through.
- How to Create a Heart Focused Family Vision Statement (includes worksheets) A Family Vision Statement reflects your heart as you describe the values and purpose that describe your family.
- Why We Bring our Devices to the Table – There is a reason why we would bring our mobile devices to the family dinner table – we have purpose and guidelines.
- Why Housework is Important – Housework often feels like a thankless task but when we know why it is important we change our motivation. Do you know why housework needs to be done?
- Why Teenagers Should Study Worldview – (Guest post by my son, Joshua) He encourages teenagers to study worldview and think about what they believe.
The Blog: I Know it is Important, But do I Know Why?
If you have preschoolers you are very familiar with their questioning – why? Why? Why? If you have grown up children you will still remember this phase that your kids went through. It is a frustrating phase that our kids go through. It’s frustrating because the questions are constant and they seem to be about such inconsequential things.
Frustrating though it may be, there is something to learn from these kids’ curiosity and willingness to ask for understanding.
Our little kids are just trying to get an understanding of their world. The question is, do we have an understanding of our world? Sure, we may already understand why the sky is blue, grass is green, cats turn in circles, how lightening happens and so forth. We understand why the car needs fuel, why daddy goes to work, and why kids need sleep!! But do we understand our world?
- Do we know why we are married?
- Why we have children?
- Why we have family night?
- Why we go to church?
- Why we read the Bible every day?
- Why we say grace before a meal?
- Why we say please and thank-you, and good morning
- Why we teach self-control, obedience, truthfulness?
- Why we homeschool? (or why we send our kids to school?)
- Why we do youth group?
- Why we do anything really?
Do we understand why something is so important to us? If not, are we going to be curious enough, like the pre-schooler to ask ourselves – why?
If we don’t understand the ‘why’ behind the things that we do, then it is just a mindless habit we have fallen into. It will be built on shaky ground – and when tough times come it will be the first thing out the window. Like the man who built his house on the sand – it will come tumbling down.
[Tweet “We must know why we do the things we do otherwise they won’t last when things get tough.”]Often we do something because mum and dad did it before us, we grew up with doing it. It has become a habit. I’m sure you’ve heard about the lady who chopped the end off her roast every week until her daughter asked her ‘why?’ She didn’t know why except that her mother did it. So she asked her mother ‘why?’ Her mother didn’t know why either, though she had also done it for years and years. All she knew was that her mother did it, so she asked her aging mother, why did you chop the end of the roast off? She told them, “The roast was always too big for my pan, so I chopped the end off!” Hardly a reason for every generation to do the same thing! And yet without understanding that is what happened.
Of course there are other reasons we find ourselves doing things too – maybe it was a good idea at the time, our friends where doing it, the church was doing it. But is there a deeper reason; a reason for why this would be the right thing for you and your family to do?
I would like to think that our ‘why’s’ come from loving Jesus and knowing His Word. There may be some things you do simply for fun – but at the same time it shouldn’t contradict God’s Word. If you are going to find your ‘why’ you need to know God’s Word – and know it for yourself.
We need to know why we do the things we do. We need to tell our children why we do the things we do. If we don’t communicate the why then it is foreseeable that the heart of these things will be lost in your family in years to come.
- The first generation (and that may be you) will be stirred up to do something, they will know why they are doing it.
- The second generation (your children) will do it because mum and dad did it; it becomes a duty, a habit and they are comfortable with it.
- The third generation (your grandchildren) will simply say, “Can’t see the point of this” and stop doing it.
You don’t want to see this happening to the things that God has put on your heart. I want to see the passion we have for God and His Word passed on to the next generation – and the next. But if I don’t start with the why then I’ll simply be passing on a form – which will turn into a lifeless form.
This is what it means to be an intentional parent. We have to know our ‘why’ – and then set out with our ‘how’. We get so focused on the how – how are we going to do this or that: the action, the doing. But to build a strong family we need to start at the beginning and know for ourselves why we do what we do.
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