Take Time to Notice
There is nothing that tells people they are loved more than an unexpected comment. When we take the time to not only think of someone but to express our thoughts we are making relationships a priority.
When we pause from our tasks and greet our family as they come and go through the day, as we look in their eyes and ask how they are doing, as we really see them and compliment them on something – these are the things that get lost in the rush of today. To say “I thought about you” doesn’t really cut it when we are talking about making someone feel special!
When we notice that our children are struggling with something we often think of a lesson we could teach, a lesson that will help them grow. But sometimes they just need being loved on. We could do a chore for them or with them, we could surprise them by tidying their room, bake their favourite dessert or offer a hot chocolate, give them a cuddle, stop and talk with them. There are many ways we can give our kids a boost simply by noticing their needs and being prepared to meet them.
One day I realised that I was forever planning on how to train my kids in this area or that area and I never stopped to recognise growth. I never acknowledged a changed heart, a new skill, a victory over an issue – we just moved on. It was a missed opportunity to build up my children’s hearts. I started writing Mum Cards. (Note to self: It is about time you write again!) Mum Cards are little notes that I send to the kids saying ‘well done’, saying ‘I noticed you’, saying ‘you are growing’. I am specific in sharing what I’ve noticed, the character trait they’ve displayed and how it has benefited my life or the life of those around us.
Another time I write to my children’s heart is on their birthday. For the week leading up to their birthday as I am praying for them I particularly look for a scripture, a prayer, a quote that is for them for the coming year. I share my thoughts and prayers for them in the letter.
Another way we can ‘take notice’ of our kids is by actively encouraging their talents and interests. When we invest our resources (time, energy, money) to our kid’s passions they know we are interested in them. It is much the same for me – if my husband doesn’t recognise the creative bent that I have then I feel that he doesn’t know me, he doesn’t understand me. The same goes with our kids – their passions, talents, interests is what makes them them. We need to not only recognise these talents and passions but do everything we can to support them to grow in those things.
It takes time to notice people, it takes time to build people up – but it is time well worth spending!